Cinnamon lumps
by purplecabbage
Summary: A story written for my sis as it is her OTP. Was posted before but she flagged it for kicks and giggles. :( sorry. LSP wants to meet with her online date but it turns out more unfortunate than fortunate. Presents the dangers of online dating.


Lap was standing in the bathroom talking to her reflection as she always did. "Oh you look lumping hot today girl!" She said as she took out a lilac lippy from her make up bag. Today she was going to the candy kingdom to see one of her online friends. He was smart and intelligent and always made her laugh. It was not hard to see that she was developing a small crush for the guy. She just hoped that he wasn't one of those perv's that stalk pretty young girls on the Internet.  
She opens her wardrobe door to see what she could wear that would show off her curvy lumps. There was a white sateen dress that her grandmother gave to her before her passing. Perfect. She slid it on past her head. It was certainly than wearing trash. Some people would say a girl cannot have too many shoes however she doesn't have feet so the use for them would have no purpose or reason. Looking again in the mirror she floated out the door. A portal to Ooo was just outside her parents house which she happened to live in. So she walked up to it and spoke the password. ( this password is censored even in the likes of M rated fanfics. )  
Now that she was in the land of Ooo she took out her phone to see where she had to go. Right she had 30 minuets to get to a Restaurant in the candy kingdom called 'sweet shack' the title reminded her of the song 'love shack'. Her date said that he would have a bouquet of purple carnations so that she could tell him from the crowd. She though this was very sweet of him seeming as carnations were her favourite flowers. They smelt so nice and attracted so many butterfly's. not before long she found herself standing at the entrance to the candy kingdom, mumbling "love shack, baby love shack!" Because since reading the name of the restaurant off her phone she could not get the blasted song out of her head. Meanwhile a silent yet nervous figure was holding a bunch of purple carnations.  
Lap pulled herself together. / come on girl wha' ya so nervous abou'?/. She opened the door. It was newly oiled so that it would not squeak or maybe it was just the candy? Who knew? With a sunken feeling in the Pitts of her stomach she looked around for any of those purple flowers that she so dearly loved.  
Not many people were in the shop this was probably because it was a Thursday morning and therefore most candy people would be at work, school or still in bed. Lsp thought that the calmness was perfect and could not wait to see her mystery man. Swerving between the tables she looked into the booths. Sitting in the middle booth was a candy person wearing a suit and had purple flowers in his hands. Lsp looked in shock. The mystery man she so wanted to meet was actually cinnamon bun! All those jokes and laughs and convocations all for what? Nothing? Oh no. Lap was not the type of person to walk away. She was going to make herself and her feelings known.  
"Excuse me, but what the ever lovin' LUMP! You go and sass some young lady's up. Make them think your decent? Well you want to know what I think? I think your just as bad as the ice king! In fact i think your worse! You just go and tangle up a girls emotions in your web of lies!" At this time tears are streaming down her face and cinnamon bun was standing up. Yet lsp continues "and you haven't even said a word to me! Haven't explained yourself! And and and..." Her voice drained away. Cinnamon bun stepped in closer and closer only a small distance parted them. CB reached out and hugged lsp. She was struggling to get free  
"Lumping get OFF" she shouted. Everyone in the restaurant looked at them. CB flushed pink and quickly let go. Lsp looked up and down at her dress. It was recked! Cinnamon sauce covered the delicate material.  
More tears streamed down her face as she hastily hovered across the candied street - whilst tearing the recked dress off- to the coffee shop adjacent. Taking her phone out of her syledex she began to pester her best friend. Or friends, they shared an account.

GalacticLumps started pestering TrueHijack at 11:34.  
GL: oh my lump! :,(  
TH: oh no! Tell us what's the matter!  
TH:year lsp tell us what happened on your date ;)  
GL: it was terrible :( he ruined my dead grandmas dress!  
Gl: I didn't think I would be one fooled into one of those types of relationships!  
TH: jack thinks you should tell us if  
He was old?  
GL: no he wasn't old. More cinnamony and sticky  
TH: augh that's gross!  
GL: I know and he got all his cinnamon junk on my trunk!  
TH: nasty girl. :/  
GL: :,) it's nice to know I have someone's to talk to when I have a melt down!  
TH: that's what we're here for girl!  
So do you still like his personality when he was on the computer?  
GL: yeah  
TH:then we think you should go talk to him!  
GL: yeah. Yeah I'll go do that!  
GalacticLumps ceased pestering TrueHijack at 11:46

So now lsp knew that she had to talk to the cinnamony stranger she set foot out of the cafe she was in. Zoom a lumpy car stopped in front of her feet just as she crossed the road. But it was all too late.

Cinnamon bun did not know what to do. He was left all on his own. No date. No friends. Nobody to hold him when he was upset. He sat back down. On the wooden chair alone  
Alone  
Alone  
Alone  
CRASH  
He then saw a purple mass under a car. It was leaking.


End file.
